I can hear my brother have sex with his girlfriend next door and there is just a lot of bed creaking and I just heard her say ‘Are you even trying?’ and I laughed so hard my brother came into the room to tell me to fuck off
(Source: garlicweenie)via technicolor-in-your-eyes
Slept at a funny angle to ease cramps, woke up with a killer back ache. Fucking A+ work there, body.
Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own.
and mixing them with vodka
At 3 in the morning while marathoning your favorite show because nobody can tell you to go to bed.
And then regretting your decisions the next morning.
Because you have to work.
and make more money to buy fruit snacks and juice pouches.and vodka
(Source: asexualarmin)via onholidaywithgreenday